Wrapped Up
by fadedstardust
Summary: Harry arrives at Grimmauld Place the summer before his 6th year. Everyone is wrapped up in their own problems, including trying to forget about the death of Sirius. One-Shot and rated for language.


Harry turned over as he heard a knock downstairs. The Dursleys were gone, they had left on a vacation to Bermuda or some ruddy place like that, so Harry had to answer the door himself. He groaned, not really wanting to get up and see who was at the door. He hadn't wanted to see anyone since he got back from school. The wonderful feeling that he'd had at King's Cross with all his friends standing there had left him the moment he got back to Number 4 Privet Drive.

It had been three weeks since term ended. Harry hadn't had any contact with anyone from the wizarding world except for his weekly letter to Remus to let them know that the Dursleys were treating him as well as to be expected. The knock came again as Harry swung his legs over the bed. He grumbled as he threw a shirt on and walked downstairs. He opened the door to see Professor Lupin, rather, Remus standing in the doorway. He looked a bit worse for wear, it looked like he hadn't slept in days. If he felt anything like Harry had the past few weeks, he hadn't gotten any sleep at all. Or if he had, it had been riddled by nightmares. Remus smiled weakly at Harry.

"Ready to get out of here?" Harry looked up and gave him his first real grin in weeks. He let Remus in as he ran upstairs to get his things. He had only unpacked a few day to day things, everything else was still in his trunk. He lugged it downstairs and nodded at Remus. Remus motioned to the door and they walked outside. Remus held out his wand and the Knight Bus appeared with a bang. Harry looked surprised. Where was all the security that months before he hated seeing around? Why were they taking the Knight Bus? It seemed a bit odd.

"Um, Prof-uh Remus? Where are we going and why all of a sudden am I not being heavily guarded? Not that I mind, just curious." he added as he and Remus clambered aboard the bus. Remus smiled at him.

"Well, I convinced Dumbledore to do things this way. Now I know you didn't want an escort of twelve escorting you back to someplace you don't want to be in the first place. That's the other thing Harry, we're going back to Grimmauld Place." He fell silent as Harry's expression turned icy.

"Why the hell can't Dumbledore just leave it alone?" he muttered under his breath, not remembering that Remus' excellent hearing would catch that.

"Harry, I know its hard. Believe me, staying there without him isn't exactly a walk in the park for any of us-"

"AND WHAT EXACTLY WOULD YOU KNOW ABOUT IT?" Harry shouted. All the feelings that had been simmering inside him while he was alone, came bubbling to the surface in hot, fiery rage.

"Don't for one second, Harry, think that you're the only person who gave a damn about him. You're not." Remus' voice was quiet. It irritated Harry beyond belief that he didn't feel the need to shout.

"Whatever. There's a lot of things I shouldn't have done, but I did them. Its up to me how I want to deal with it."

"You call this dealing with it Harry? By crawling up inside of yourself and giving up? By yelling at everyone and blaming yourself for everything that night? By just wrapping yourself up further into your issues? That's not dealing with it, Harry, I know."

"How do you know?" Harry asked, his voice still quavering on the verge of more shouting.

"Because I've done it too Harry! Jesus Christ, because I was there too and I feel just as awful about it as you do!" Suddenly, Harry was flung forward and into the seat in front of them as the Knight Bus stopped. Both of them had forgotten they were on it. Remus looked up and the driver was motioning to them.

"This is our stop Harry."

"Great." Harry said, the sarcasm dripping from his voice. He and Remus both grabbed a side of his trunk and hauled it off the bus. It took off and they were left standing, looking at the ominous old house in front of them.

* * *

"OW! Dean! Ssh! You want someone to hear you? You know you're not supposed to walk me this far." 

"I know, I just wanted to spend more time with you." Ginny rolled her eyes and gave him a quick kiss. He leaned in closer, trying to deepen it, when Ginny pulled away. She emerged out onto the walkway of Number 12, to come face to face with Remus and Harry.

"Professor! Harry! Uh, hi." she said lamely. She was busted. If they had heard her with Dean, she wouldn't hear the end of it. She had convinced her mother to let her visit him because he only lived down the next street, however her mother had given her strict instructions not to let anyone find out, otherwise she couldn't see him until school started. Remus smiled at her as if he knew a secret. She looked at him wide eyed, praying he wouldn't say anything.

"Its ok, Ginny. Your mother let me know what's going on. After all, who is Voldemorte to stand in the way of young love." he winked and Ginny blushed.

Harry just stood there, digging into the cement with his shoe, wishing it was a hole he could sink into. He didn't feel particularly cheerful at the fact that Ginny had been enjoying herself all summer while he had been stricken by grief and overcome with guilt and sorrow. Yes, she was definitely the one at fault here, having fun with her boyfriend while sleeping each night in a dead man's house. At least Harry had the consideration to still look and feel remorse and unhappiness for his godfather. What would she know anyway, its not like Sirius had ever been of any great importance to her. She was probably glad he was gone, like Hermione, she probably thought Sirius had been a bad influence on Harry. Well they could go to hell for all he cared, Sirius was the closest thing to having an immediate family that he ever had and he'd be damned if they were going to walk all over it.

By this time, the three of them had entered the house. Harry hadn't noticed, he was so deep in thought. He didn't really notice anything until he felt Mrs. Weasley bring him close to her in a large hug.

"Harry dear! How are you? Oh look at you! Were you eating anything at that Muggle place? Why you're skin and bones, love. And look at that shirt, its two sizes too big for you! Oh, your hair's a mess and-"

"Mum! Probably the last thing Harry wants right now is you fussing over him." Ginny said, exasperated. Ginny's words seemed to hit Molly hard. Her expression softened. "I'm sorry. Come on Mum, Ill go make everyone some tea. He's fine…just leave him be." she insisted weakly as her mother went to fix Harry's hair.

Harry stared after Ginny. She seemed different. She was stronger now, taking care of her mother, not the little lovesick girl he thought she was not minutes before when they had seen her with Dean. He followed Remus into the kitchen, thinking a cup of tea was exactly what he needed to help calm him down. He didn't like the fight he'd had with Remus. He hadn't meant for things to come out the way they did, it just happened. A lot of things seemed to happen that way lately. They all sat around the large kitchen table as Ginny put on a kettle of water for tea.

Ron came into the kitchen when he heard the whistle of the kettle. He noticed his best friend sitting at the table.

"Harry!"

"Hey Ron." Harry said, standing up and shaking hands with him. Ron pulled him into a hug, surprising Harry, who stood there, awkwardly wrapping his arms around his friend.

"How are you?" Harry asked him, not really knowing what else to say. Ron shrugged.

"As good as can be expected. But I'm the one who should be asking you, mate. How are you holding up?" Harry stiffened. He suddenly felt every set of eyes on him, watching him as if he was a ticking time bomb about to explode. Maybe he was.

"WHY IS EVERYONE OBSESSED WITH MONITORING MY EVERY EMOTION? WELL HERE IT IS! I'M ANGRY, GUILTY, SAD AND BLOODY FUCKING PISSED AT THE WORLD!" Molly and Ron both paled, their faces shocked at what he had just said. Remus held his head. After just calming the boy down, he was off again. Ginny, however, stood up and slapped Harry across the face.

"DON'T YOU DARE TALK TO MY BROTHER THAT WAY! He asked you a simple question. And yes, it is probably one you're tired of hearing, but get over it, Harry. We only ask because we care. You can't act so selfish every goddamned day of your life. Look, we can't always be there for you and if you push us away now, you're only going to make it worse. Maybe if you weren't so wrapped up in yourself, you'd see that!" She stormed out of the room. Harry looked after her, dazed. His face still stung but the guilt that struck him with her words stung even more. Everyone remained silent. Molly stood up.

"I'm so sorry, Harry. I don't know what got into that girl. I'll go and have a talk with her." She left and Harry put his head down on the table.

"Ron," Ron flinched as Harry said his name, "I'm really sorry, I shouldn't have done that. Its just…hard." Ron looked at him sadly.

"I know mate. I know. Just don't forget, its hard on us to see you this way." He too stood up and left the room. Harry sighed. Remus made a noise. Harry looked up at him.

"Says here Hermione's coming this evening." he said. He was reading a letter that was addressed to Ginny that had been carelessly left on the table. Harry nodded.

"I'm going to go talk to Ron." he said, standing stiffly. Remus waved him along. Remus sincerely hoped that Ginny's slap had done Harry some good. Not that he condoned physical violence at any time, but perhaps Harry had needed it. Perhaps they all needed a bit of a slap. A wake up call would do them all some good.

He too left the kitchen, holding the letter to return to its rightful owner. He felt it best a certain person in the house not see what Hermione had to say…that is, until that certain person was ready to see it. Maybe that's why Ginny had left if out there in plain sight. But sure enough, Ron passed the letter up, not curious at all to what it might say. Remus chuckled to himself, even he could see how head over heels Hermione and Ron were for each other. He was glad of it. He meant what he said earlier about Voldemorte and young love. Love was an unknown concept to the Dark Lord and might be the very thing they would need in facilitating his downfall.

Remus found Ginny sitting alone in the front room. She was writing furiously on a long bit of parchment that was already half covered. Remus cleared his throat. She stopped writing and turned, acknowledging his presence.

"Hey Professor."

"Ginny, call me Remus. I haven't been your professor for almost three years. Please stop calling me that, it makes me feel so old." He made a face and she laughed. Her laugh was so pretty, like the sound of wind chimes blowing in a summer breeze.

"Here," he handed her the letter, "You left this in the kitchen. And Ron didn't see it, whether you wanted him to or not." he added. Ginny looked down at the parchment he handed her. She nodded.

"Thanks Remus." He nodded and sat down at the couch behind her. He picked up the book he had left on the coffee table and started reading. Ginny looked at him for another minute before turning back to the desk to continue writing.

* * *

Harry climbed the stairs with legs that felt as if they were filled with lead. He reached the room that he and Ron had shared last summer and found his trunk alongside the empty bed. Ron was lying on his bed, looking at the ceiling. He heard Harry's footsteps and turned to look at him. Harry felt awful, how could he have said those things to his best friend? He opened his mouth to apologize when Ron started to speak. 

"Harry, do you ever get urges?" He turned quite red as he asked. Harry looked at him puzzled as he sat down on his own bed.

"What kind of urges?" Ron's face turned redder.

"You know, URGES." he emphasized, glancing at Harry's nether region.

"Whoa, Ron. I'm your best mate, but um…no." Ron rolled his eyes.

"No! Not for me, you dolt. Just answer the question, do you ever, you know…feel like being with a girl?" It was Harry's turn to redden. He knew what Ron was talking about.

"Well, I'm not perfect, Ron." he said, grinning sheepishly. Ron's face turned angry.

"I'll kill him!" he said, fuming.

"Who?" Harry asked. What had gotten into Ron?

"DEAN!" Harry had to bite his tongue to keep from laughing.

"What does Dean have to do with our urges?" Ron let out an exasperated sigh. Sometimes he wondered how the boy-who-lived ever managed to do so. He could be so thick sometimes.

"If we have these urges, and Dean is the same age as we are, isn't in natural for him to have the same urges?" Ron asked, sitting up on the bed to look at Harry. Harry nodded.

"Yeah, I guess."

"And if he's dating my baby sister, isn't he going to have these certain urges towards her?"

"Yeah, probably."

"I"LL KILL HIM!" Ron jumped up, his shout frightening both Hedwig and Pig who were perched on top of the wardrobe. Harry just shook his head. Ron obviously needed a slap from his sister. He was grateful, however, that Ron seemed to have forgotten all about the incident in the kitchen. Harry didn't have time to worry about that or Ginny for that matter. He was wrapped up in his own issues, he didn't have the time to try and figure out what kind of urges Dean felt towards Ginny, though he could definitely see that they were justified. Ginny had turned into the type of young woman that could rationalize those kind of urges.

* * *

Seeing Hermione hadn't been the good thing it promised to be. Someone had obviously told her not to ask Harry how he was feeling but he could tell she was itching to ask. As soon as he felt a surge of anger and exasperation at the unspoken question, Ginny's slap came back with a an uprising of guilt. They only asked because they cared. But then, as suddenly as it had died away, the rage was back. Sure they cared for him, but they seemed to barely feel anything for Sirius. None of them. They never pestered him with the awful question of how he was doing, or made sure he got enough to eat. They only cared about the Golden Boy, not his escaped convict godfather. 

He pushed around his food with his fork, making it look like he was eating it, but everyone at the table could tell he wasn't. Molly looked as if to say something when Remus laid his hand on hers and shook his head discreetly. She sighed and went back to her food. Harry was sitting next to Hermione who was seated at the end of the table as she had just arrived. She and Ginny were talking to each other in whispers. Ron though he caught the word Dean leak from Hermione's mouth and so he was straining himself to try and pick up snippets of the conversation.

"Where the hell are those extendable ears when you need them." he whispered to Harry. Harry just shrugged. Ron was getting way too caught up in this idea of Ginny and her URGEnt lover Dean. Ginny started giggling at something Hermione said.

"Ginny dear, can you please be quiet. We're trying to eat dinner." Molly looked very tired.

Ginny looked quite affronted by the request. She slammed her fist down on the table furiously. "I'm sick of walking around like there's a fucking funeral march in here all the time. Why can't we just be happy for what we still have? Am I the only one here who wants to move on?" She stalked out of the kitchen and a few minutes later, they heard her door slam.

"I'm sorry. Oh Remus, she doesn't mean it! I'm so sorry, Tonks, everyone. She just needs-"

"Molly, its all right. Its understandable." Tonks said, looking to Remus for help. Remus sat there looking thoughtful for a minute.

"No, you know what? Ginny is right. We're so wrapped up in feeling goddamned sorry for ourselves that we're just making our own lives more miserable. She's right, if we just took the time to appreciate what we still do have, we'll be all the better for it."

Harry stared at him. Of all the people that Sirius had affected with his death, Remus was the last person he expected to be trying to forget him. It just proved to Harry further that no one in this house had ever cared for his godfather. So what was the point in him escaping and playing the sodding hero and getting killed for it, if no one was going to give a shit? Harry felt furious with the whole lot of them.

Dinner at that point had disintegrated and so Hermione and Ron started clearing away the dishes. They gave each other silent looks and kept glancing at Harry who was still sitting at the table, stabbing his fork into it. Remus looked at the large clock in the hallway, easily seen from the dining room.

"Its getting late. You lot should probably get to bed. Not like there's going to be anything interesting going on, just some Order paperwork." he added, as he received death glares from the trio. Hermione and Ron knew when they weren't wanted. They turned to walk out the door but waited for Harry. He waved them along.

"I want to talk to Remus." Harry said flatly. They exchanged looks with Remus and he nodded so they left and Harry turned to his old professor. Tonks was watching the two of them carefully.

"Did you mean what you said earlier, Professor?" he asked, his eyes steadily fixed on the older man.

"Harry, I've told you, you don't have to call me-"

"Just answer the question, Remus!…please." Harry unclenched his fist and let the fork drop from his hand.

Remus looked at Harry carefully as if gauging to see whether or not Harry would start yelling again.

"Yes Harry, I did mean it. Its not doing any of us any good to be bottling everything up inside like a firework that could go off at any moment. Sirius wouldn't want us to be wandering around his house with our shoulders slumped all day. He'd be ashamed and we should be too. He didn't die for us to sad about it!"

Harry felt his stomach tighten and felt him crawling back inside himself, being wrapped up in his emotions again. "SIRIUS WOULDN'T HAVE WANTED US WANDERING AROUND HIS HOUSE IN THE FIRST PLACE!" He was yelling again, but he didn't care. None of them cared, so why should he? They had no right to hold their heads so high in the house of the man that had taken a fall for them all. Remus threw up his hands in defeat.

"I don't know what else you want me to say. I'm just telling you what I believe but you're obviously still too wrapped up in yourself to realize it." Harry grunted in frustration and threw his chair back, sending it in a clatter to the floor. He left and Remus put his head in his hands. Tonks looked at him.

"Do you think that may have been a bit harsh?" she asked. Remus turned his head.

"No, Harry needs to learn that he has to let go. He can't stay locked up inside himself for the rest of his life. He just can't." Remus left and walked to the front room where they had laid out that evening's work. Tonks followed, standing Harry's chair back up. She glanced up towards the bedrooms. All their doors were shut. And the people who cared had been shut out.

* * *

Harry woke with a start. He'd been dreaming again. It wasn't as bad as some of the dreams he had, but it was bad enough. It was the fifth time that week he'd seen Sirius fall behind the veil in his dreams. At least this time he hadn't woken up in a cold sweat and screaming. He would have a hard time getting Ron off his back then. He looked at his wristwatch. It read 2:00 AM. He groaned quietly. He didn't relish the thought of going back to sleep just yet, just to see Sirius fall behind the veil again and just to see himself standing there, able to do nothing. 

He left the room quietly and headed for the kitchen. Everything was dark, lit only by the moon that reflected gloomily off the clouds. Harry sat at the table after pouring himself some water. He sat thinking about his godfather. He felt that little bit inside of him crawl even further into the deep recesses of his being. He'd stayed closed off for so long, he couldn't do anything but keep it that way. He finished his glass of water and put the glass in the sink. He walked out of the kitchen and passed the front room, only to stop, hearing gentle sobbing coming from the room. Harry had always been a curious boy, plus his propensity for saving/helping/comforting people won over on him and he peeked inside.

She was sitting on the couch, her head resting gently on the arm. In her hands she clutched a red blanket to her chest, holding it so tightly he could see her white knuckles from where he stood across the room. The dim fire reflected off her beautiful red hair, making it seem as if it too were alive and dancing like fire. Her shoulders shook with such great intensity that Harry thought she would make herself sick. The muffled sobs echoed fairly loudly in the empty room, yet still she cried. For a minute, Harry felt a tinge of anger. Hadn't she been the one who had told them all to stop being sad and just be happy with what they had?

The rage dissipated as another mournful sob issued from her tiny figure. She looked forlorn and lost, her façade of strong young woman now shattered revealing the scared little girl inside of her. Harry couldn't help but feel drawn to her, wanting to comfort her and hold her in his arms til her cries subsided.

"Ginny?" he asked tentatively, walking over to the couch. The sobs stopped and she looked up at him. Her face was stained with tears, her eyes bloodshot and her bottom lip was trembling. She saw who it was and quickly tried to hide the tears running down her face and wiping the ones that were still welling up in her eyes.

"Harry. Oh god, Harry. I can't imagine what you must think of me." Harry shook his head. This wasn't the time for her to feel embarrassed or silly that she had been crying.

"Gin, are you ok? Why are you crying?" She laughed through her tears.

"Ah, the tables have turned. Now I get asked the awful question, eh?" She continued to shake and Harry spoke again.

"Ginny, what's wrong?" He sat down on the couch next to her.

"I miss him, Harry." she said softly. Harry looked down at her, surprise obviously written across his face.

"I know what you're thinking, why should I miss Sirius? After all, he wasn't my godfather. See this blanket?" she held the blanket up so Harry could see it. He nodded and she continued talking.

"He used to wrap me up in it," seeing the confused look on his face, she explained, "The first week we were here last summer, I had an awful nightmare. It was the middle of the night and I was so frightened to be in this house. I sat in this room crying for what seemed like hours. He must have been awake, either that or I woke him. But he came down here with this blanket. He wrapped it around me and I cried into him until I fell asleep in his arms. He never said anything about it to me, not even the next morning when we woke up. After that, every time I had a nightmare, he would do the same thing. Sometimes he could sense when I'd be coming because I would open the door to go downstairs and he'd be standing there. He'd wrap the blanket and his arms around me and I'd cry til I calmed and we fell asleep. I miss him so much Harry. This is the first time I've had a bad dream since he's been gone and he's not here. I just…" she trailed off as she started to cry silently. The new tears were the only sign that she was crying again.

Harry didn't know what to say. He felt a pang of jealousy towards Ginny. She had shared this intimate relationship with his godfather, something he never had. He felt he couldn't feel sorry for her, this girl who held herself so high above the others, being able to forget about Sirius and then coming to cry over him once night came. It was hypocritical and it filled Harry with more rage. But all of that melted away when he heard her sob again. That cry, so full of pain and anguish. She was crying because the one person who could have eased her pain was gone.

Without thinking, Harry slid the blanket out of her grip. She eased slightly and let him tug it away from her. Her sobs still wracked her body feverishly. Harry took the blanket and wrapped it around them. Ginny was much closer to him now and he could still feel her shaking violently. He closed his eyes, willing for her tears to stop, for her to feel safe in his arms, as she had felt safe in Sirius' arms. He drew her closer and her head nestled close to his chest. The blanket smelt of Sirius. His aftershave smell mixed with the scent of smoke. It was distinctly Sirius. He felt the hot wet tears slide down his cheek.

They sat there, holding each other, sobbing. They clung to each other as if their lives were dependent on it. As he held her, Harry felt that awful clench in his stomach release. He no longer wanted him to be wrapped up inside himself, all he wanted was to be wrapped up with her until her pain melted away.

That's how Remus found them the next morning, wrapped up in each other's arms. He smiled to himself as he closed the double doors leading to the front room. 'Voldemorte doesn't stand a chance against young love.' he thought as he committed to memory the image of two young people totally, selflessly wrapped up in each other and nothing else, not even themselves.


End file.
